Now that I've returned from Jordan and am in the process of getting situated in Yemen, I've had some time to reflect on the months spent in Palestine and feel its necessary to express some of my emotions and thoughts before moving on to the next chapter.
Its not the norm, but I tend to reflect on the things I will miss in an area long before I leave. The same goes for time periods in my life that carry certain distinguishing traits which I know will not last. Perhaps my family's tendency to move frequently programmed me to appreciate the aspects of a place that contribute to its uniqueness since the time given to relish in it was always unknown. I'm not sure if doing this helps me enjoy the present more, but I know that recognizing certain things does prevent me from taking them for granted.
I know I will miss the smell of spices and herbs that grab my attention as I pass by the spice shops in the Old City and picking grapes and figs on my way to work. I'll miss the strangely secure feeling I get when riding the Arab buses, playing hide and seek with young kids who made their way to my seat while taking in the subtle (or not so subtle) sound of Arabic music streaming through the background. I will miss conversing with the Arab shopkeepers in Beit Hanina and finding bunches of fresh mint slipped into my shopping bag, a thank you from one of the Palestinian kids that runs the fruit stand I go to. I already miss my roommate Alina. There are many things I will take away from this place and I know time will eventually snatch most of the smaller memories from my recollection, but the general feeling will remain. The truth is I was able to create a strong and diverse community for myself here.
I won't miss the daunting heat or the various forms of pollution that seem to cling to the streets and hills. I won't miss constantly running into armed soldiers (more accurately, kids with guns), checkpoints, watchtowers or the desperation and hopelessness I see in the eyes of the Palestinians. I won't miss the hate and distrust I see in the eyes f the Israelis when the Palestinians are mentioned. Nor will I miss worrying about whether or not the curves and skin on my body is efficiently covered according to the place I am frequenting.
I hope that despite the ugliness and ignorance I've encountered here in its various forms, that I remember the overwhelming kindness people (Palestinian, Israeli and foreigner) have bestowed on me. Its really quite overwhelming when I examine the extent to which individuals have reached out to me. I will try my best to pass on the same gestures and attitudes to others.
Summing up the last eight months seems impossible to do and frankly, one blog entry dedicated to attempting this would devalue the overall experience. Besides, it is one I will be absorbing for some time to come. The issues that weave the fabric of this conflict are deep, unrelenting and multifarious. To say the situation here is complex is the understatement of the century, but in some regards it possesses such simplicities. Eventually, the crisis here will be solved, though "solution" itself is a subjective concept. How soon, just, and effective the solution will have to reveal itself in time. In terms of the US, as the global balance of power continues to shift, I do not know how it will choose to conduct itself further with regard to the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict. I am certain, however, that US actions or lack there of in respect t the Israeli Palestinian Conflict, will have drastic implications for future US relations with Iran as well as with the International community. I can only hope that while governments and institutions juggle policies and approaches back and forth that the Palestinian people don't become further brushed aside, forgotten in the midst of competing agendas.
There will always be radicals on both sides of any conflict and while I have no interest in justifying these ideologies, I see it as crucial to attempt to understand them: to be able to view an individual through the same lens with which they see themselves as a result of their unique experiences and within the context that they live their lives. I have met those who accept an explanation for the behavior of another as long as it supports their current ideology or eases their conscience. If we cannot see past this and rely rather on truth and facts, if we do not strive to understand how other's actions and philosophies develop and manifest themselves, even if that means acknowledging the abhorrence of our own humanity, then the pursuit of change is a futile one.
Goodbye for now Palestine and Israel. It has been incredible, but I know we will cross paths again.
Its not the norm, but I tend to reflect on the things I will miss in an area long before I leave. The same goes for time periods in my life that carry certain distinguishing traits which I know will not last. Perhaps my family's tendency to move frequently programmed me to appreciate the aspects of a place that contribute to its uniqueness since the time given to relish in it was always unknown. I'm not sure if doing this helps me enjoy the present more, but I know that recognizing certain things does prevent me from taking them for granted.
I know I will miss the smell of spices and herbs that grab my attention as I pass by the spice shops in the Old City and picking grapes and figs on my way to work. I'll miss the strangely secure feeling I get when riding the Arab buses, playing hide and seek with young kids who made their way to my seat while taking in the subtle (or not so subtle) sound of Arabic music streaming through the background. I will miss conversing with the Arab shopkeepers in Beit Hanina and finding bunches of fresh mint slipped into my shopping bag, a thank you from one of the Palestinian kids that runs the fruit stand I go to. I already miss my roommate Alina. There are many things I will take away from this place and I know time will eventually snatch most of the smaller memories from my recollection, but the general feeling will remain. The truth is I was able to create a strong and diverse community for myself here.
I won't miss the daunting heat or the various forms of pollution that seem to cling to the streets and hills. I won't miss constantly running into armed soldiers (more accurately, kids with guns), checkpoints, watchtowers or the desperation and hopelessness I see in the eyes of the Palestinians. I won't miss the hate and distrust I see in the eyes f the Israelis when the Palestinians are mentioned. Nor will I miss worrying about whether or not the curves and skin on my body is efficiently covered according to the place I am frequenting.
I hope that despite the ugliness and ignorance I've encountered here in its various forms, that I remember the overwhelming kindness people (Palestinian, Israeli and foreigner) have bestowed on me. Its really quite overwhelming when I examine the extent to which individuals have reached out to me. I will try my best to pass on the same gestures and attitudes to others.
Summing up the last eight months seems impossible to do and frankly, one blog entry dedicated to attempting this would devalue the overall experience. Besides, it is one I will be absorbing for some time to come. The issues that weave the fabric of this conflict are deep, unrelenting and multifarious. To say the situation here is complex is the understatement of the century, but in some regards it possesses such simplicities. Eventually, the crisis here will be solved, though "solution" itself is a subjective concept. How soon, just, and effective the solution will have to reveal itself in time. In terms of the US, as the global balance of power continues to shift, I do not know how it will choose to conduct itself further with regard to the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict. I am certain, however, that US actions or lack there of in respect t the Israeli Palestinian Conflict, will have drastic implications for future US relations with Iran as well as with the International community. I can only hope that while governments and institutions juggle policies and approaches back and forth that the Palestinian people don't become further brushed aside, forgotten in the midst of competing agendas. There will always be radicals on both sides of any conflict and while I have no interest in justifying these ideologies, I see it as crucial to attempt to understand them: to be able to view an individual through the same lens with which they see themselves as a result of their unique experiences and within the context that they live their lives. I have met those who accept an explanation for the behavior of another as long as it supports their current ideology or eases their conscience. If we cannot see past this and rely rather on truth and facts, if we do not strive to understand how other's actions and philosophies develop and manifest themselves, even if that means acknowledging the abhorrence of our own humanity, then the pursuit of change is a futile one.
Goodbye for now Palestine and Israel. It has been incredible, but I know we will cross paths again.
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